Love & Marriage

WHY “NO” TO PRE-MARITAL SEX?

TO AVOID TYING YOUR SOUL TO SOMEONE WHO HAS NO PART IN YOUR FUTURE. 

PhotoCredit:Unsplash

Now, since someone once asked me what soul-tie meant, It will try and define it quoting a source verbatim since I wholly agree with that source.

“Sex is a tridimensional experience: spirit, soul, and body. Anytime you have sex with a person you bond with them. Dr. Daniel Amen writes in his book, “Change Your Brain, Change Your Life,” “Whenever a person is sexually involved with another person, neurochemical changes occur in both their brains that encourage limbic, emotional bonding. Limbic bonding is the reason casual sex doesn’t really work for most people on a whole mind and body level. Two people may decide to have sex ‘just for the fun of it,’ yet something is occurring on another level that they might not have decided on at all: sex is enhancing an emotional bond between them whether they want it or not. One person, often the woman, is bound to form an attachment and will be hurt when a casual affair ends. One reason it is usually the woman who is hurt most is that the female limbic system is larger than the male’s.”

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This is what we call soul ties. Sex is like gluing two pieces of wood together and the next day ripping them apart. Of course, wood from the opposite board remains on each board. A piece of your sex partner, stays with you (and vice versa) for the rest of your life. You can only imagine what it looks like when you bond with multiple partners.”

See https://www.moralrevolution.com/blog/7-signs-of-an-unhealthy-soul-tie?format=amp.

You’re soul-tied if for instance you are in a physically, and/or emotionally, and/or spiritually abusive relationship, but you “feel” so attached to your partner that you’re almost unable to cut off the connection and set boundaries with them. You’re soul-tied to someone if you’ve left a relationship (maybe long ago), but you think about the other person obsessively (you can’t get them out of your mind). You’re soul-tied with someone if when you have sex with someone else (hopefully your husband or wife), you can hardly keep yourself from visualizing the person you have a soul tie with.

PhotoCredit:Unsplash

Even if you still believe that sex doesn’t bring you into spiritual connection with anyone, you will agree that sex brings you into soul connection. The soul is the seat of emotions. Sex clearly involves emotional bonding. Emotional bonding with anyone is a soulish phenomenon.

I probably didn’t appreciate how serious this issue of soul-ties can be until I counselled with a young lady recently. I ministered God’s word to her and counselled her to stay clear of further premarital sexual relationship. She told me no problem. And that she believes she won’t have any challenge staying clear. I was excited until she continued. Except if a particular guy shows up. I thought I didn’t hear clearly so I clarified what that meant. She told me point blank that if that guy shows up, she won’t be able to refrain from having sex with him. Waoh. what a power the guy wields. How I wish thus guy was her husband. My research shows that it was the guy that deflowered her and the two were in a sexually active relationship for some time afterwards before the relationship broke.

She admitted to me that she can’t stop thinking about that guy. Of course, the guy has long moved on because for men, sex is more of a mere physical activity that a soulish affair. She calls him all the time. He often ignores her call these days. She makes out all manner of excuses for him why he couldn’t pick. I really pitied her. The challenge is if nothing is done to severe that tie, her marriage to another man will not even solve the problem. She will keep thinking of the guy even when having sex with her husband. And the day the guy shows up around, an extramarital affair will likely begin. I as a man will not even want to be married to a woman on whom another man wields such immense power. It will be risky venture except that tie has been broken.

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What a waste to be soul-tied with someone who is just a casual guy or girl in your life? Someone who is not a part of your future or destiny So think of keeping yourself, think of your husband keeping himself too and both of you are losing your virginities to each other and both of you are soul-tied to one another in your marriage. What beauty that will be. That’s God’s perfect plan.

By the way, have you ladies now seen why guys want to sleep with you as quickly as possible after you give in to their advances after a long chase? They want to reverse the equation as quickly as possible. So you will be tied and be the one chasing them thereafter. You will then be thoroughly abused emotionally, psychologically and maybe more painfully, sexually too. You should be wiser now.

So let me hear from you and learn from you. I want to find out if you can relate with what I’m saying. If you’ve broken a soul-tie before, can you tell us how you did it so we can all learn from it?

 

P.S: This life changing article is a part of a series on Reasons why you  should not indulge in premarital sex written by Peniella Akintujoye Esq. Watch out for other reasons on this series

Thanks for reading!

 Peniella Akintujoye Esq.

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(9) Comments

  1. Amokeodo Victoria Iyanu says:

    I love this. Thank you very much

    1. TemidayoRiches says:

      Thanks Sis.
      Thanks for reading

  2. Abiodun Elizabeth says:

    This is timely and intriguing. It very much relevant in our day. Wiring this to a friend ASAP.

    Kudos

    1. TemidayoRiches says:

      Thanks so much, Sis

  3. Taiwo grace says:

    Thanks for sharing the truth sis. I pray that there will be a divine spread of the truth God has deposited in you. I cherish you

    1. TemidayoRiches says:

      Thanks so much,Sis

  4. Godwin Ekema-Abasi says:

    This is a timely piece. The youths of this generation needs to hear this. You are doing a good work, keep it up.

    1. TemidayoRiches says:

      Thank you,Sir. Keep coming back

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